Memo to all Employees on Special High Intensity Training:

   
    In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity  from
employees, it will be our policy to keep all employees well trained through our
program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING  (S.H.I.T.)
   
    We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T. than anyone else. If you
feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T., please see your supervisor.
You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list, and our
supervisors are especially skilled at seeing you get all the S. H. I. T. you can
handle.     

    Employees who don't take their S. H. I.T. seriously will be placed in
DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T.)

    Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T seriously will have to go to
EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T.)
   
    Since our supervisors took S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they don't
have to take S.H.I.T anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T already. 

    If you are full of S.H.I.T, you may be interested in a job teaching
others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LEADERSHIP LIST
(B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T).

    Thank you,
   
    BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING
    (B.I.G.S.H.I.T)
   
   
    P.S. Now send this S.H.I.T to 5 people who need S.H.I.T in their life, just
not the same person who sent you this S.H.I.T They have already had their fill
of S.H.I.T